~Danielle~

What love the Father has bestowed on me that I should be called a Child of God!

Have I a clue-absolutely not.

But will I allow that to stop me from learning and experiencing His love?

Never...

This past Wednesday, I was crying out to God about the dream of our baby Grace and how the vision for her was dead and only He could resurrect it if that was His plan. That was in the morning. Later on in the afternoon, I received a call from my sister at church asking me if I would talk to my husband about keeping their baby girl for an entire week because they'd been blessed miraculously to go on the K-Love Cruise!!!

We are so honored to be able to serve God in this way as well as keep their sixteen yr. old as well and sow seed for our Grace.

Danielle is the sweetest little girl-(she's five months old)-...she wakes up and there's a smile on her face as soon as she looks at Jef or me...melts our hearts...Even after I have to suction her nose with the syringe! She screams and then when it's over she smiles at me so as to say, "Thanks, so much. Now I can breathe again!"

I realize that I'm out of 'baby shape' and this crash course is good for us! JEF HAS BEEN A JEWEL and enjoyed the morning feeding, rocking and just holding her and praying.

That same morning I prayed, I mentioned to the boys that they needed to get ready for their sister! Boy, were they surprised and delighted to find out that Danielle was coming to their home. They've been 'driving' her around the house in her stroller and giving her much attention!

Now, I know that Danielle's life is our opportunity to sow for our harvest...our Grace!!! You better believe that this 'seed' is being tenderly taken care of in order to honor her parents, my Heavenly Father and to allow our dream to be brought to fruition...Hallelujah!

Then last night, Melissa and I were watching the video of the twins birth and she asked me when I knew I was having twins and I said, "January 26th" when it 'dawned' on me that it was Jan. 26th to the day, ten yrs. later! I am confident that God is performing His Word in our life...then I woke up this morning (that happened often last nite!) and I was reminded of Abraham believing God when his body was as good as dead...He keeps reminding me that He is so in love with me and knows what He's doing...if I will only trust His infinite love.

I'm sure I'll be learning much this week about myself, my Father, and I promise to keep pix coming so you guys can see how blessed-enviably happy (with a happiness produced by experience of God's favor and especially conditioned by the revelation of His matchless Grace) we are and how beautiful this precious life is...she has her own amazing testimony and perhaps I'll be able to share that someday.

Good nite!

~Tuesdays with Ashley~

It's becoming more and more clear why THE only foundation any believer can have that will stand the tests of life is Truth, the Words of our God and the revelation of Jesus Christ as the chief cornerstone. (This should be a no-brainer, ya know?)
We HAVE TO HAVE Truth define us, not experience, talents, abilities, passion, house, job, children, career, anything that would exalt itself above the knowledge of God.
We just watched, "Tuesdays with Morrie" and a little truth mixed with some lies makes for a faulty belief system for anyone that thought that movie explained the mystery of life and death...yes, there was the reality that the main character, Mitch, was wasting his life, he was full of selfishness, etc, but when he visits Morrie, who's dying and Morrie begins to speak 'truth' to Mitch, Morrie misses the most important thing...the reality is that, yes, we all die. But we're really already dead without Jesus. The only way to live is to repent and receive Life. We either live forever in His presence by believing in Him - or suffer forever in hell away from His presence in darkness where the worms eat us and the fire is not quenched. Check this out:

Mark 9:47-49 (NLT)

And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out. It is better to enter the Kingdom of God half blind than to have two eyes and be thrown into hell, 'where the worm never dies and the fire never goes out.' "For everyone will be purified with fire.

John 8:24 (NLT)

That is why I said that you will die in your sins; for unless you believe that I am who I say I am, you will die in your sins."

John 8:51 (NLT)

I assure you, anyone who obeys my teaching will never die!"

Jesus paid the penalty for our sin so we can live forever and only if we die do we experience that...die to our desires, our will, pick up our cross and follow Him and give up everything.- Luke 14:33 (NLT)

So no one can become my disciple without giving up everything for me...

...then we really can live. So, yes, Morrie was right when he said that in order to live you have to know how to die. But he missed the whole point...die to what? I understand the Truth to be that One man died so we all could live...so in His death comes our life.
I had to get these thoughts out because the first time I watched that movie I cried. I mean really cried and this time I saw through the emotional attachment of losing someone to the reality that we only go around once and we have to have the designer of Truth give us the truth. If there is architecture, then there must be an architect. There is a designer and He has designed us to know Him and Truth. Why live a lie? I'm done with that...done that too long and wasted too much time.

I titled the post, "Tuesdays with Ashley" because we've been having a sweet sister over on Tuesday nites and this past Tuesday she brought a friend and the Life that we shared brought death to places in their hearts that were alive and needed to die and life to those places that were dead and needed Life. I watched as He took His Word and revealed His love to each of them and How irresistable is that love.

Thank God for His passionate love for us, each one of us. Revel in it...

I'm Still Here!

For those of you who thought I'd dropped off the bloggyville planet, it's just not so! But I have to say that things are not the same anymore for me...you see, I've been wearing a mask. Sunday afternoon, the mask came off. The thing about blind spots is how can one know there is a blind spot unless someone loves you enough to expose it and I didn't know I had this mask on, really I didn't have a clue...but those who love me saw the mask, and they really loved me enough that they sat down with me. The mask was pride, selfishness, judgment, and offense. I wore it so well and long that I never took it off. Except perhaps when I was in worship...that's the only time I would take it off. Wearing a mask made me say and do things that weren't really me, but what I 'thought' was who I was...too much at stake to be honest, risk, fear of more rejection. Not going there...a mask is much safer, kinda like a blog...don't get too close, you might not like me, so when I blog, I can express myself and not worry about what you think...huh? Perhaps that's why I began writing...it's all come down.
I was trained to wear a mask as a child...it's called hypocrisy. SO ugly, but I felt I had to wear one in order to cover the hurt from the rejection, abuse that I'd gone through. It's difficult to write all this out, but I know the enemy hides in the dark. Those who love the Light come into the Light to show their works are done in God...these weren't and therefore were kept 'hidden'...except that they were hidden from me. I was blinded by the sin.
There has been this constant struggle within myself of taking things personally, getting offended, hurt, feeling rejected, misunderstanding words that were spoken to me and misinterpreting those words (see the power of words?), and then judging everyone and everything through this sickly heart and mind.
Oh, but for His Love and Mercy!
As a child, I was abused, taught things that weren't truth about me, raised in perversion,but then to cover it up, we pretended...if we were to survive, we had to pretend. Rejection is a result of rebellion. There was a point in my life that I rebelled due to a trespass against me, which, in turn produced rejection and that coupled with the hypocrisy from the other authority in my life produced these bondages, open doors for the enemy to wreck havoc in my life.
So, then rebellion began to grow deep roots...Physical family dysfunction makes it difficult to relate in one's spiritual family. But in the kingdom of God, there are no secrets and since He is coming for a church without spot, wrinkle or blemish, Praise Him for His true authority to do the hard and difficult things and perform heart surgery on me in order for me to be healed, body, soul and spirit~!
I'd been desperately crying out and asking Him why these same issues (offenses) kept tripping me up,
...but the blood of Jesus...He has such mercy, tender lovingkindness to patiently pursue me! He brought the power of the Spirit of the Living God through those that He's set over me to cover, protect, encourage, equip and shepherd me and they sat down with me and told me the truth about me that I needed to hear to set me free from the bondage I'd walked in and couldn't seem to get out of.
I needed to forgive someone very dear to me that I really hadn't given any thought to. (That was really big (evidenced by the emotions when this person's name was brought up and I was asked if I'd forgiven this person!) I needed to see the mask, ask to be forgiven for the hypocrisy that had become idolatry in my life, and take off the mask, renounce the pride in my life, hypocrisy, and offense and receive His forgiveness, love and begin to be who I am in Christ, not Daune.
I'd like to write that immediately I 'felt' great, but when I realized that I'd been living a lie in certain areas of my life, I had to see the only Truth is in the Word of God and His mercy to show me these things and then I had to trust Him to show me how to live my life through Truth, the only way to live.
These are the two Scriptures He gave me the next morning:

"Let the godly strike me!

It will be a kindness!

If they correct me, it is soothing medicine.

Don't let me refuse it."

Psalm 141: 5

"May Your Gracious Spirit lead me forward on a firm footing."

Psalm 143:10

The second verse came as a result of me crying out wondering 'what do I do now?' I was reminded of Joyce Meyer commenting on how after God had freed her from the chaos and insanity of her life, she wondered how to just enjoy peace and rest...that place of turning from death to the Life...yet, it's all good...I've made some decisions and am taking steps in faith to change some things around in my life. Get off the sidelines, be who I am in Jesus and not fear man, worry about things that don't matter, trust God with the things I don't understand, continue to submit myself to Him and to my husband, take my thoughts captive when the enemy attempts to hit me with lies and/or discouragement and walk in faith.

Thanks for 'listening'!

~Thankful Thursday or Just Another One of Those Days~

Well, after sleeping thirteen hours as a result of taking Night Time cold medicine from H E B, I actually feel like a living, breathing human today!

My dear love brought a bottle home for me after work and then he and the boys headed out for our cell group and I thought I'd rest in bed and read the Word as well as my digital camera book! Well, that lasted maybe ten minutes and I was out for the night. Can't remember the last time I slept that long...I feel so much better today.

That's just one thing I'm thankful for. The list goes on...

Ray Comfort's blog entry about dinner with 40 atheists and the encouragement that he continues to give by his example.

My granddaughter, Hailey, and the joy she brings me when I hear stories of all she's doing. Ann @ Holy Experience encouraging moms on what's really important! (It's so awesome!).

Two wonderful boys that can fly through the air, dream and be in far, far away worlds imagining themselves saving our planet, helping good Bionicles, making houses from boxes, and living Life through their imaginations...I love it!

Another thing is having a husband that daily feeds me and the boys the Word, diligently studies to show himself approved, and delights in being with me! Wouldn't you agree that having your husband delight in you is the best!

If that's not the case with you right now, perhaps it's a time to seek the Father about what He wants you to do to be his (little h) delight...maybe it's making Him (Big H) your delight and then listen when He tells you to give selflessly to your man when it would be easier to be selfish, or when you're too tired :) ...just a suggestion. I know for me, that there is one thing that causes my husband to believe he can take on the world...it's when he is fulfilled...the world is lighter, creativity flows freely and I know I'm honoring my Father!

Let's get real, girls...this is one weapon in our arsenal that we sometimes fail to use to fight the enemy...let's not be like Eve that wandered away and listened to the father of lies, but one that purposefully fights for our husband, children and family...I have no idea why I went this direction, but I'm sure someone out there is reading and you've been selfish, self-centered and are wondering where God is and why there is no power in your life...submission is powerful...Jesus taught us all about it and 1 Peter teaches us, too...read ch. 3. There are no conditions on submission, either, there in that passage...it's a promise and His Word is a Rock...cannot be moved; He doesn't lie and His Word stands forever...when are we gonna get that?

Well, guess I've gotten all that out!

Be thankful, content, and grateful (these things lead to a thankful heart)...greed, among other things, will bring the wrath of God. Colossians 3:5-11 is written to believers, not unbelievers.

The way that leads to Life is narrow. Ouch, Hallelujah! (A favorite saying in our body lately!)

~Wordless Wednesday~

~Delicious Friendship Amish Bread!~

The fragrance of Amish bread is wafting through our home right now and it smells wonderful...my dear sister, Sandy, from church, gave two sisters and myself a bag with the 'makings' of the future bread and daily we've been 'mashing the bag'! I've even called these sisters a couple of times to ask if they've 'mashed their bags!' On the tenth day, it's time to actually receive the reward of the 'mashing'...kind of like faith...every day we have to 'mash' our 'bag'; then one day, it's time to 'eat' the fruit of our labor...how cool, huh?

I like the fact that it's Friendship bread...Jesus calls us His friends if we do whatsoever He commands us. John 15:13-15 (KJV) says: "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. [14] Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you. [15] Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you." Wow. As His friend, He tells me all the things that He's heard from His Father. What a privilege.

That word, whatsoever, means as (much, great, long, etc.) as :- all (that), as (long, many, much) (as), how great (many, much), [in-] asmuch as, so many as, that (ever), the more, those things, what (great, -soever), wheresoever, wherewithsoever, which, × while, who (-soever). the so you can decide if you really are His friend.

Another thing about the bread that I love is the fact that it's given to a friend. I trust the person giving me this 'mushy-like' substance, I appreciate that she considers me her friend, that she thought of me, and then that her 'seed' is multiplied because after the ten days, there's enough to make three more bags from my original to pass on to those I consider my friends. It is a principle. Math=multiplication...

We know man does not live on bread alone. Yet, as His friend, His Life is in me and that Bread feeds many. He laid down His Life for me, therefore I lay down my life for others.

Never thought I'd get that much from a bag of 'mush'! Friendship is a precious thing, never to be taken for granted. Jesus thought so, I'm convinced. Otherwise, why would he offer us His friendship if it didn't have any value? He raised the bar of the meaning of friendship...makes me wonder if I really am a friend--to Him and others.

Just my pondering.

It was great bread!

!One Last Thing!

I forgot to mention this, but Ray Comfort is having dinner tomorrow with some atheists and has asked for our prayers...knew you'd intercede! Thanks.

Unnoticed but precious...

Notice the dried leaves around the sac?

She was a good mommy and gave thought to the protection of her babies...

Raising Boys!

For those of you that have a boy at home, is it not a gift to raise a boy? I mean, the reality that he will care for his own family as well as carry the torch of the faith of his father! For example, Jesus...He was a carpenter, just like his earthly father. Yet, He only served in that 'field' until His time came to fulfill the purpose for which he was created~to die for you and me and then resurrect to bring glory to His Father in heaven.

These boys we're raising now are carriers of the anointing of the God of Heaven's armies and if that's not a sobering task, I don't know what is! To intercede on their behalf and listen to the most Holy Spirit to know the direction to take them daily is my heart's cry.

We took a walk today to speak of and view God's world and how they fit into it...it was also a time of discussing things pertaining to life and death; choices, consequences of those who've gone before them, good or bad...I love those times when they can think, pretend they're David with a slingshot (Caleb made one from a rag and I had to watch him constantly to be sure I didn't accidentally get hit in the head with an 'off course' rock!) and I can show them how to see things that are sometimes hidden...

Oh, I want to share what happened yesterday. We were on our way home from church and there, in the road, was a retriever...I was certain it was Berakah...we pulled over and I kept calling, "Berakah, Fuski" in the tone of voice we always spoke to her and she wagged her tail and I began to cry...she was way down the road from where we live, and people came out walking down their long driveway as I yelled, "Is this your dog?" To which they answered, 'No'; Then I yelled, "Did you find her?" To which they answered, "Yes"...my heart began to leap...tears began to well up in my eyes, thinking the entire time...'my dog... I can't believe how much I missed my dog.'

Well, when the people got to me, and me them, I looked at her and she was acting strange...I kept thinking, "she doesn't remember me!" I told the lady, "I'll know if she is my dog by the problems on her skin..."

Well, she lay down and I started to rub her stomach and check her out and then that dog bit me!...I knew right then it wasn't my Berakah...I had allowed myself to come unglued only to discover that it wasn't her...and I'd gotten bit in the process...I cried off and on all the way home, asking myself why this was such an issue...I thought I'd gotten over her being gone...it's been almost a year and yet I found my soul was still attached to the point that I was ready to get a Retriever puppy without any forethought...my dear husband said that if I couldn't just look, not to bother, because it wasn't the right time to get a puppy...I submitted to Jef and then the lady said that there were puppies, but not Retrievers...so, I was ok (it had been hard to let it go at first and I wanted Jef to say, "Sure, Babe, go ahead and see if it's what you want!), then, cuz that's the kind I am looking for. It was such a strange feeling to miss something that you thought you'd gotten over with...I'm sure that's the way it is with a person you loved and lost...I have no idea what that's like. My gramma was so far away from me for so long and when I did visit her, she had Alshiemer's and didn't even know anyone anymore. That was sad, but I only have fond memories of her and she was the instrument God used to lead me to Him...I anticipate the day we dance before the Lord together.

Well, that's all for today.

Enjoy your evening.

Thursday came and went...

Well, since I'm writing this on Friday early...like 12:55 am, I guess I'll only recap what happened over an hour ago, yesterday...

We had company tonite...it was going to be a campfire, but it got way too cold for the ladies to go out, so we all sat around and looked at all the millions of pix I've taken of church and my other stuff...it was fun particularly for me to have others enjoy my work!

Everyone just left a little while ago and it was a blast to have company!

I'm posting a note my best friend left on the bathroom board...for some reason I keep it in there and we write each other love notes...it's a great New Year thought...hope you enjoy...Married love is the only way to go! Commitment...unconditional love, forgiveness, opportunity to express yourself with someone standing next to you saying, "you go, baby, I'm right here no matter what..." and so on...Today is Fun Fact Friday...one is supposed to come up with three new trivia facts on this day...Jan. 4th...I have one...the paper straw was patented in 1888 by a man named Marvin Stone in January of that year...now, aren't you thrilled you know that? I got my info from a Highlights magazine that the boys have!

Can you share one new trivia fact with me today? I know a lot of people read my blog, but the responses could be better...so what if you have to set up an account, just do the hard thing and do it!!!!! That would make my day...

Ponderings...

I have been thinking about what exactly to write tonite...

Perhaps I could elaborate on what I've gathered from the few blogs that I have visited lately...nah, you can read them yourself by going to my fav's and reading their entries...I could write about a few of my favorite things, but then I was thinking about how I only seem to talk about 'me' and who really cares about what I think anyway? Then I (notice all the I's?)...well, anyway... So, I'll just ponder a while and you can join me if you like!

...there's the beautiful birds that are now visiting the bird baths that were out all summer and only a bird or two came for a drink...today, there' been bathing going on all day! And the temps aren't very warm, either....don't think it got up past 54 today...

Tonite was the first New Year cell group back at our home and it was a stirring study about leaving the old and striving toward the new...in Jesus, not our human abilities, credentials, heritage, anything that we would or could find any security in other than in knowing Him, sharing in His sufferings, and somehow to obtain to the resurrection from the dead. The place we're all headed, one way or another, ya know.

This morning, the boys and I were reading a book called, "Created for Work" by Bob Schultz and this particular chapter was on working on your exit strategy...seeing things done before you even begin. For example, seeing a job finished and how that helps to get the job done excellently...also, like marriage, our life, knowing that one day our only exit strategy is death and having that worked out before we get there...and then there was the truth that the only exit strategy for marriage is death...so, if that's the case, what am I doing in order to ensure that the life I have now is one where I'm giving my everything for the day I exit and say goodbye to the people I love the most, that care for me the most and the people that Jesus Christ has brought into my life for His purposes? I tell you, it made the boys sit up in their chairs and think a little differently!

Then we're also reading Ray Comfort's book, "101 Lessons on Biblical Evangelism" and today's lesson was on the fourth commandment, "Keep the Sabbath day Holy" and ya know, it all goes back to our hearts...He is driving the point home that our hearts are what He wants...He is so consistent, faithful, and persistant.

Trying to be a good person, keep all the laws, and the Jews had 610-613, depending on who you're talking to, is impossible...yet, we keep trying...do this, don't do that, do it only this way, wear only this kind of clothing, teach your children 'this' way, and on and on...and those are the ones we've made up, not the ones in the Old Testament...but the point remains...when are we going to get the memo that Jesus paid the penalty for all our sins and that our response is to yield to Him and allow Him to be the Lord over our lives...totally, completely, no matter what we want? I am digesting these truths and have been for a long time. But, lately, I must say, the Potter has had this vessel on His wheel and turned up the heat several notches in order to remove these impurities so He can establish His kingdom-righteousness, joy and peace- (the rule and reign of God)-in my heart and then, as a result, I, in turn, pass that on to others, particularly these precious boys He's entrusted us with!

It's very late and though I'm enjoying the quiet and the opportunity to actually reflect without interruptions, I should say good nite and encourage you to begin with the end in mind; it will change how you think about the job for the day!

It wouldn't be me if I didn't atleast try to post one pic!

My best Friend and Lover!

~Happy New Year!~

A new year and with it come fresh ideas, plans, goals and visions that I have for our family and my life.

I lay in bed this morning dreaming of what I am asking the Father to work out in my life this coming year.

But before I go on to the new year, I want to recap all the wonderful things Jesus Christ did for us and me this past year.

I am so grateful that I have my camera because I can actually remember a lot of the events based on the pix I took, despite the fact that I didn't get it until April. Before that, I recall that Rachael, Peter and Hailey came in March. My friend, Nancy, also came at the end of March and we all went to the coast and the boys swam in the ocean...I want to include a pix of that, for sure.

Then in June, which was a hard month for me physically, our son, Dan, came for the first time and we had such a great visit.

I messed up the plane ticket for him by putting Jef's name on it, since I'd never done that before and the online ticket company, Priceline, said we couldn't have another ticket or our money back (they were sooo rude)...but Our God is faithful! We were awarded all our money back (that took a couple of months) and Dan still came the very next day he was supposed to originally come when Josh got him a ticket. That was amazing!

Another wonderful thing was learning to believe the Word of God, even if EVERYTHING I 'SAW' AROUND ME WAS SCREAMING THE OPPOSITE. I'd been in the hosp. three times, once for a blood transfusion and every time I went to the ER they told me I needed to have a hysterectomy and I'd cry out to God for answers and just believe, despite what I'd heard...after two months of waiting to finally see my own dr., he reassured me I DID NOT NEED a hysterectomy and apologized for the sloppiness of the ER and the way they'd treated me...I admit that I could not seem to shake the lies, but when he sat with me and Jef and said I was not going to get cancer from the bleeding I'd had, I saw clearly how the enemy had tried, almost successfully, to rob me of my lfe...I'd stopped doing anything, thinking that it would make things worse and I just sat around...I felt like I'd gotten my life back.

Another wonderful thing that occurred was our Equadorian daughter, Paulina, that lived with us over eleven years ago came for a visit. God worked out all the details for her to come while she was visiting family in Florida. She took a bus to see us! We had a beautiful time with her and she got to meet the twins for the first time.

Then there were all the parties and fun things we did with our church...like Memorial day...